Heartbreak
While I was sorting through my writings, I found a short text I wrote more than two years ago. Unedited, here is a flashback of my July ‘09.
Aggression
I decide to go in-line skating. This is one of my greatest passions. I always end up exhausted, but the feelings from the fast and demanding ride are indescribable. Listening to great music, I speed on my eight large wheels and forget the world for a while. This time, there is a lot to forget. I carefully prepare for the greatest performance I am capable of. I need to destroy myself. I need to spend every remaining joule of energy, I need to sweat blood. I set up fast-paced, loud trance music and start skating at the top of my strength. I am moving extremely fast, soon losing my breath. The world is a blur, and so is my mind. I drive out all thoughts but one: FASTER! This is my nirvana. Endorphin is quickly washing away my worries, my pains, my emptiness.
After a while my knees start to buckle and my strength disappears. I make a short stop to drink and eat something sweet. And then I continue. I choose Forever Today by DJ Tiësto.
Tranquility
I am going fast, very fast. I look around the fields, around the blue sky, I gaze into the bright sun. While listening to Just Be (Antillas Club Mix), again by Tiësto I breathe in the scent of summer. The air is warm, fragrant, heavy. I slow down. The ride is no longer an aggressive run. I need to just be. Just be. I am suddenly very calm, even happy.
I was lost
And I'm still lost
But I feel so much better
'cause now I know
It's not so far
To where I go
The hardest part
Is inside me
I need
To just be
Just be
Hope
After I take off the skates, I collapse on a curbstone and start listening to Love Comes Again by Tiësto. I am slowly sipping water, my heartbeat is calming down, and I am thinking about the lyrics.
Love can come again
You gotta believe that
Love comes again
Just when I booked in none of her
Love can come again
It did.
Speak your mind
Allowed HTML tags are a, blockquote, em, code, li, ol, p, pre, strong, ul. Links to other comments in the form “[IV]” or “[4]” are detected automatically.